It was calm, silent. There is a strange comfort in it, I thought. The storm that I feel inside of me every day seems to be somewhat calm, I remember I was laying on the bed, I remember I was tired, drifting away into the dreamland but I didn’t think it would be black where I could think so clearly. Maybe I was just up, you know? But then I felt these annoying strings on my face and the feeling seemed so familiar. I realized that's exactly how the hair feels on my skin, strangely annoying. But I was alone, so how in the world was I feeling hair falling on my face. I snapped open my eyes and I saw hair, these black heavy locks, funny I didn’t feel surprised either. It was as if I was so used to it, I shifted my eyes and saw a face partially, mainly the eyes because the rest of it was either hidden by hair or the sun light that glistened on her skin making it glow as if she was some angel. God, her eyes are beautiful. Ha, I somehow know the person is a she, there is this familiar warmness around her that makes me feel warm too. My eyes shifted again and I saw her bright smile, I am still trying to figure out how I ended here right after falling asleep but it seemed so right as if it was meant to be.
A sweet voice rang through my ears “wake upppp” followed by a giggle and a peal of soft laughter and I was sure the female just spoke to me, the voice seemed to further calm me down. I felt so comfortable and happy that the hair falling on my face didn’t matter anymore. As I was into my senses I chuckled and groaned “mmhfhm, hey guapa”, my lips curled into a smile and I closed my eyes again only to open them moments later, I wanted to see her! yet for some reason, I just lifted my right hand and booped her nose. ‘What am I doing?” I thought to myself but my brain put that thought in a corner. Today was not the day to question things, today was a day to forget everything, the reality, people, and places. Everything dissipated, why should I care? I am happy. Maybe everything happening before was just a dream and I woke up from that deep slumber into a reality that I had forgotten about for living that dream for so long. Finally, it was time to be back with someone I felt complete with. Just when I was ready to be up in this reality with this female, it disappeared in a blink of an eye. The perfect world disappeared leaving me in disappointment and a slight ache.
I opened my eyes again, this time I was in my room. Why did it have to be a dream? I wondered. But it felt so real, more real than whatever this was.
A thought was born that day, would you rather live a dream or your current reality? I am sure the dream is very tempting and fulfilling, I dreamed of it because it was my perfect reality or perhaps a sweet vision of the future.
Do I think my life is bad? no, I have a job, a family, friends, and everything someone needs. So why did I have that dream, am I not satisfied enough? obviously not but I do appreciate each person in my life, I am grateful for what I have then why is the need to have something entirely different. These thoughts took root in my head, maybe this is something I have to figure out and it seems important, somehow I feel that the moment I figure it out life will make more sense. I am greedy, but then humans are in general, nothing wrong with that. This is me feeling guilty about who I am and me telling myself it is not wrong, can it get worse than this? Now that I think, It is ironically funny. I want to make that dream a reality but this one is out of my reach, not something I can get just by being smart or working hard. This one is on fate. This one, I want more at this moment.
