I Looked At Her Again

I looked at her again, my eyes always seemed to stop at her smile whenever I looked at her. That bright smile is one of the most attractive things about her, I chuckle now that I think about the irony of the situation. You might not believe me but I have fantasized about this moment, whenever I thought of her in the past, somehow I could picture her sitting across me with her hand cupping her face while she smiled at me. It made me smile every time, this strange idiotic smile that just appears on my face whenever I think of her. My chest fills up with such warmness that it is one of the most amazing feelings in the world. Some people might call me love-struck, these are the early symptoms of it after all.

I often wonder what makes her so special, is it the timing that we met on? I can’t feel what I feel towards her for someone else at this point. I have tried in past, looking at other women trying to find those similar feelings, but never have I felt it. I remember the day I saw her for the first time over a video in a room that was dark but illuminated enough for me to see her face and there she was smiling brightly as a day with a hue of red on her cheeks, It was surprising to see her blushing but I guess we were shy and liked each other a lot.

People say their significant others are perfect if you ask me, it is not true. My love is not perfect, I don’t think her imperfections make her perfect either. If you think this is negative, no it is practical, how many have you been in a relationship with a perfect person to eventually be disappointed. The expectation of them being perfect seems wrong, you know why? Because I am flawed, so flawed. She knows that I know it too yet she accepts me, with a condition that I will never stop putting effort to be better.

Now, I will pull off one of those cheesy lines. Love doesn’t have to be perfect, it is usually imperfect, those imperfections only make us human. Love my friend is this drive, it makes you want to be better, it's that craving to make your partner happy. Selfishly being selfless. Let that sink in.

The reason that the title is

I looked at her again

While you are reading this, I want you to think about her from a different perspective, because when I started being in love it was hard for me to see her flaws, or rather I ignored them. We humans are quite desperate and vulnerable towards love so it takes away our rational reasoning for a duration of time, now while this might sound diabolical it is just human.

My love is a runner, she runs away from stressful situations. She is weirdly honest because she tells me that I am not perfect for her, I don’t love her because of these qualities but I don’t feel disappointed either, why should I? These traits make her who she is. I love her because she tries her best, whatever the situation is, she is there supporting me unconditionally and selflessly. I think that is good enough, I heard there is only one right partner, but all the partners are right to teach you something, maybe about yourself or maybe what you need.

With that being said, I hope you find a good enough person. :,)

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